Since yesterday the video clip of a Bengali bride refusing to do the kanakanjali (ritual of throwing the rice backwards to repay the parents’ debt) has gone viral. She very bluntly said, “No one can repay the parents’ debt.” Also, in the same video some lady said, “Come again”. She very casually said, “Of course, its my home. I will come whenever I wish to.” The girl went smiling, she wasn’t crying. I really loved the gutsy bride. The best thing was none of the nosy relatives or people could say anything to her, at least on her face. That’s how the girls should be!
I liked it! Even I didn’t do Kanakanjali after my wedding. This was eons ago. What does one mean by repaying a parent’s debt?? Also, I went smiling with my husband and didn’t cry during “bidai”. Why do generally brides cry during Bidai during Indian weddings? Because in most cases the girl loses the freedom to visit her parents as and when she wishes, the parents lose their “right” over her and so on! I was smiling because I was happy to start a new life and till this day have the “right” to visit my parents as and when I wish to!
May be I was fortunate. But I strongly believe the girls should be raised strong and gutsy as that Bengali bride who refused to give in to the age-old rituals which should be defunct by now. Log to waise bhi bolte hai hain!
A daughter will always remain a daughter for her parents and the relation and rights shouldn’t change with marriage.